31 things for my 20 year old self

I wrote this post last year to my 20 year old self last August 2013 and decided that I will add a thing or two, each year to it, for my birthday, because, let’s face it, we grow a lot and learn a lot each year. Oh, and my birthday is Saturday and I am turning the big 3-1!

Last year, I turned the big 3-0. It’s funny, because it really isn’t that life changing of a year. I mean, you get older, yes…, but life changing? No. When Reagan was a few months old, this gal told me that I had no idea what life was and my life wouldn’t even begin until I was 30. Married and two kids in, I found the statement ignorant and comical at the same time. I’m happy to say that my life began way before I turned 30 and this past year has been full of ups and downs, highs and lows, just like the rest of my years. It has been a pretty life changing year for my family in certain aspects, but a move would have been life changing at 30 years old or 12 years old. It’s funny because last year around my birthday is when we first made our decision to move and here I sit, writing this post, in my kitchen, in my house, in Texas! I still wake up some mornings and miss California…especially with this insane humidity that we are having right now (hello sauna outside!), but all in all, this move has been the right choice for our family and that’s what matters.


Here is my letter to me:

Dear Me,

1. Don’t worry so much because, I promise you what lies ahead is way better than you could ever imagine.

2. Do what you love. Even if no one supports you. The people who love you and believe in you will support you in every endeavor.

3. You will be set up on a blind date and you will end up marrying that amazing godly man.

4. He will be your biggest supporter and your best friend. When I say biggest supporter, I mean it. He will cheer you on in anything you chose to do.

5. Dance like no one is watching. Ignore the people who laugh at your dance moves. Just enjoy yourself and have fun. That’s all that matters.

6. Pray without ceasing.

7. Always follow YOUR dreams.

8. Never let anyone bully you and guilt you into staying in their life. If it’s not working for you, then it’s just not and you don’t owe an explanation.

9. True friends are just that, true friends. You will only get a few in your lifetime, but they will be there for you always.

10. Do the things you want to do. The time wasted sitting around making excuses as to why you can’t do them, is time that could have been used doing said things.

11. Being a mom will be the hardest and most rewarding job ever. It’s never easy but it will be the best thing you’ll ever do.

12. You will do nothing with your college major. You will spend lots of years wondering if you should have and that’s okay because you still can.

13. You will move all over the place in the next ten years and you will have some great experiences and meet some amazing people.

14. You will teach yourself lots of new skills that you’ve always wanted to learn.

15. You and your sister will have kids around the same ages and this will be one of the greatest things. Seeing them all interact with each other and seeing how they love each other so much will be priceless.

16. Do not put so much stock in what certain people think of you. There will always be certain people trying to bring you down. Hold your head high and “keep on keeping on.”

17. Lots of amazing things will happen and also lots of tragic and tough things will happen. Remember to hold onto your faith. It’s hard at times, but knowing there is someone out there with a plan for YOU and YOUR life, will get you through.

18. You will always love pink and glitter. (duh)

19. You will begin watching the show Frasier and you will watch it every night and it will be key in helping you fall asleep.

20. You will always laugh a lot…even through the hard times.

21. You will always struggle not taking things to heart, whether it be an attack on you personally or an attack on your business. It will always be hard for you, but remember that you have lots of people cheering for you. They are who matter.

22. ALWAYS trust your instincts. More often than not, they will be right.

23. Always trust your mom’s instincts too. She has been right about soooo many things!

24. It’s okay to cry. Most times, after a good cry, you’ll feel better.

25. Eat dessert. Eat cheeseburgers. Life is too short to count calories constantly.

26. People will let you down. That’s just part of life.

27. Even on the hardest day when you think you can’t take anymore, remember to be thankful for ALL your blessings.

28. Always take lots of pictures even if it makes your hubby crazy! 🙂

29. Treat each day like a special occasion.

30. Don’t let fear control you.

ps…Wear sunscreen. Seriously, get in the habit now…it’s a good one.

Added August 2014

31. Moving is hard. Duh. You will realize (and remember from when you were growing up) that no matter where you are, what city or state you live in, as long as you are with your immediate family (though you’ll miss the parents, sibs, friends and grandparents like crazy), you are home and you’ll be okay. Some days will be harder than others and you’ll wish you were somewhere else, but take heart, better days are coming.

ps…read number 16. and number 21. like a million times. There will come times that you’ll need that advice a lot.



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  1. Shay Shull wrote:

    I just love this!! And I love you too! I Find you absolutely adorable, totally honest, genuine and sincere. You are one of my favorite people Ashley! And yes, Frasier helps me fall asleep to…every single night. XOXO

    Posted 8.21.14
  2. Kelly wrote:

    I needed to see the last one! We are getting ready to move and I am not happy about it! Time to pull up my big girl panties!
    Love your blog!

    Posted 8.21.14
  3. Maria wrote:

    Ashley – I don’t often comment but have to say I really enjoy who you are and the fun that you add to my world when I read all your posts! You are such an inspiration – can’t imagine anyone picking on you or your business but then again, there are lots of people with issues out there. I am happy to hear you do not take them to heart and i appreciate the advise to do the same for myself and often!! thanks for sharing so much fancy inspiration!!

    Posted 8.21.14
  4. britt wrote:

    I loved this ! 30 seems so “grown up”.. im only 24 hahah

    Posted 8.21.14
  5. Hayley wrote:

    Thankyou for posting this truth this morning. we have just moved back from Australia and are waiting for our home to close. Staying with my sister-in-law has been challenging as she constantly degrades my entire being- I needed to read your words this morning to remind myself to shine through others darkness and that I am a great mom, wife and person and that’s all that counts right! blondes will always have more fun xx thanks Ashley!

    Posted 8.21.14
  6. Kelley wrote:

    Beautiful post ash! #15 is so perfect. I love that the kids are all so close and share so much love

    Posted 8.21.14
  7. Calley wrote:

    I am not one to comment but i Love this idea! I love reading your blog and reading about your sweet family. I giggled at the sunscreen comment. I cringe at the fact that I used to willingly go to the tanning beds! Never again!

    Posted 8.21.14
  8. April wrote:

    Hi Ashley. I just started reading your blog a few months ago and love it. I have 3 kids and almost identical taste in fashion and home decor. It is so much fun reading your posts to get ideas. This post is by far my favorite. Such great advice and I can relate to so many of the things you wrote. I admire you because life is hard and people can be so mean but you seem to stay positive. Happy birthday!

    Posted 8.21.14
  9. meg wrote:

    I love this!! So perfect and true in every way! i laughed at the college major because my dad just loved that i changed my mind at college graduation 🙂

    Posted 8.21.14
  10. LOVE this so much. taking these tips into consideration for sure! 🙂

    Posted 8.21.14
  11. Heather wrote:

    Love this so much! Though I’m not quite 30 yet, I’ve learned that some of these are SO true and not something that I would have totally believed just a few years back. Thanks for the great life reminders! 🙂

    Posted 8.21.14
  12. Amanda wrote:

    I absolutely love this!! What a great idea to write a letter to yourself—continue adding and know that you are doing the best in this beautiful life we’re given. Happy Birthday!!!

    Posted 8.21.14
  13. Mandi C. wrote:

    That was so great! And thank you…I can especially relate to #31. Having just moved to TX (Houston) from NY. My husband and I moved here in November- leaving all of our family and friends behind. And it gives me warmth in knowing that I am not alone. You’re right sometimes it’s hard…missing our parents the most. But my husband and I, and our fur-babies (for now) are my family. And truly as long as we have each other that’s all I need. Thank you!

    Posted 8.22.14

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