I’m Too Busy

Happy Monday, peeps. So, I sat down to write this post a few weeks ago, then stopped. But here I am finishing it. I’ve been thinking a lot about the words “I’m too busy,” lately. It seems to be the perfect excuse. The kind of excuse that you don’t feel guilty using, because in all reality, we are all just TOO busy. For example, I can’t get to the gym one day, well, I’m just too busy, so it makes me feel better about missing it. I hadn’t thought much about these words until I was at the chiropractor a few weeks ago because my neck, back and hips are a mess and she recommended that I come in a few times a week to get better. The first thing that came out of my mouth was “I’m just so busy. I don’t see how I can get in in here once a week, let alone twice or more a week!” Her response was along the lines of “Stop saying you’re too busy. You can make time for these things.” At first I was thinking, “no seriously, I am too busy. I find myself running around like crazy trying to get things accomplished while my kids are in school. I hardly sit until we are home for the afternoon/evening.” But, before I replied, I thought for a minute and realized she was right. I can make time to get my neck, hip and back in better shape. I can make time to get to the gym. I can make time to get dinner started early in the day, rather than scrambling at 5pm (these are random examples). And so on…

But, this little encounter has got me thinking about how often I use the words “I’m too busy” or “I’m just SO busy.” When people ask how I’m doing, my first response a lot of the time is “Busy! But good! How are you?” It’s almost like its an automated response and we just say it to say it because we are supposed to be SO busy all the time. Don’t get me wrong. I am busy. We all are. We are wives, raising kids, juggling schedules, running households, working, and more. I have more on my plate than I probably should, but I manage it and I have always thrived on a schedule. But, at the same time, I enjoy a weekend of doing nothing, of having nothing scheduled and just hanging out. I try not to over schedule us for a reason. I never want to my kids to feel busy and over scheduled. My mom made sure we weren’t over-scheduled growing up and I am trying to do the same for our kids. After this chiropractor appointment, I started to make a conscious effort to reply with other things besides “busy!” when people ask how I’m doing. I mean, I am lots of other things besides just busy. That would NOT be the one word that I would want to use to describe myself. Although, it does feel at times like it’s all I am, busy. I also started thinking about these tasks that make me so busy. These days where I am wearing myself thin to get EVERYTHING accomplished in such a short time and I just stopped doing it. I flat out stopped. I stopped the making a CRAZY list that not even superman could accomplish in one day. I shifted my priorities a bit. And I’ll tell you, I feel less stressed. Also, I think about everything prior to saying yes, these days. I’m a yes person. I hate to disappoint people, so I have always tried to say yes as much as possible. But, I have also learned that I can’t do that either. Over the past year, I say no if its not going to work for me or my family, in whatever sense it may be. That has been huge and I must admit, it makes the things you actually agree to do, way more meaningful when you’re not saying “YES!” to everything. I have lots going on and lots to do, but really does it all need to be accomplished on a Tuesday? No, all of these items can be spread out throughout the week and it makes for less hustle and bustle.

It’s funny, because as soon as I stopped putting the pressure on myself to get everything done, I feel better. I don’t feel like I’m running around like a chicken with my head cut off while my kids are in school. I’m not staring at my phone clock in line at the grocery store and making a mental list of what else I need to get accomplished before 1:30 when I pick Reagan up from school. I still have days that are completely over scheduled. Like today, I had an appointment for myself that I scheduled back in August. The little presidents have dentist appointments, Teddy has a 7 year well checkup and we have Reagan’s half birthday at school (they celebrate summer birthdays, so the kids with summer birthdays don’t miss out!). Honestly, I look at this day and think “omg what was I thinking?” but then I also look at it and think “well, it’s just one crazy day and I’m thankful that all of my days aren’t like this.” I’m still learning the art of being not busy. I think there are lots of us who thrive on being busy. I am one of them. I always have been. But, I finally realized this was not the way I wanted to live. And since my kids started school, I feel like I have been in a constant state of BUSY. And in turn, I’ve been in a constant state of exhaustion and stress. I’m learning how to be good with the not busy. I’m learning to just enjoy the quiet and chaos-free days. Those are the days that I am thriving on now. It’s definitely something that takes a conscious effort and I don’t think I’ll ever become an expert at being not busy, but I must admit, life is way less stressful, when you don’t pressure yourself to be the busy bee that we are all trained to be. And in case you are wondering, I still haven’t made it to the chiropractor a few times a week. Baby steps, people, baby steps. As with everything, I am a work in progress and I am enjoying not being “too busy” and I must admit, I am thankful that someone called me out on it. Every once in awhile, we need a reality check like that! Can you relate? Are you living a life that is too busy too?