It took me a few weeks to be able to write this post without tears completely blurring my eyes, but oh well, they are anyway, so here we go…
After losing one of our dogs in January, my heart ached to add another dog to our family. Not to replace her, but to bring some joy back into the house after losing her. We went back and forth a lot about the decision. We went through the process of finding a breeder, picking a puppy and bringing him home. Upon getting him here, it was pretty clear that it was bad timing for numerous reasons. Ultimately, after lots of praying and thinking, he has been rehomed. If you ask my close friends and family, and especially Mr. Fancy, it wasn’t an easy decision for me. I spent weeks trying to decide what to do. I shed and am still shedding lots of tears over this. I tend to dwell on things. I worry a lot. Ultimately, it was right to let him go, but, it took time to admit it. He was only in our home, a couple weeks due to being away for vacation, which was planned prior to getting him. He was always planning on going back to the breeder to stay while we were away. That didn’t make it easier to say goodbye. It was one of the hardest decisions that we’ve had to make. I love big. I wear my heart on my sleeve. If you’re one of my people or animals, I love you with all my heart. Saying goodbye was awful and I still think about it daily.
There are lots of factors that went into making our decision. I don’t feel the need to go into any of them because it’s personal, but it was the best decision for our family and that is what matters to me. He is happy and thriving and that is what we wanted for him. The breeder that we got him from was wonderful through everything and she kept telling me “God isn’t doing this for nothing, Ashley.” And HE didn’t. Lots of lessons were learned in the past month. I think maybe in a few years, when the kids are older, we will try again, or maybe we won’t. I can’t plan that at this point. I decided to share my story with you in hopes that you might relate to it. I’m sure there are going to be people who can’t, but at the end of the day, it’s like that quote says, if we all knew everything about everyone, we wouldn’t judge anyone, right? There are so many different factors that go into every decision that we make and I won’t ever feel guilty about doing the right thing for my family.
I think the biggest lesson that I have learned in this, is when you think you really want something and you get into it and then you realize it was the wrong decision for whatever reason, it’s okay to admit you made the wrong decision and move on from that. It’s not only better for you, but it’s better for everyone involved, although it may take some time to see that. You can’t let your worries about what others will think, steer your decision, because in the end, you have to do what’s right for you and your family and anyone involved. I also learned a lot about grace. Yes, we should give ourselves grace daily, but really, we need to give each other grace as well. One particular person that I dealt with through this whole situation taught me so much about grace and for that part of this, I am thankful. I look at this lesson as a big one and honestly one that I wish turned out differently, but it didn’t and at this point, all I know is that we did what was best for our family and that is what is important.
As always, thank you for your love and support. XOXO
I’ve been through the same thing and it is heartbreaking (even when it was right). I adopted a dog in college and it was clear that I wasn’t ready for the commitment at that time in my life so I reached out to the adoption agency and he was quickly rehomed to a family that he is thriving with. Now, a few years later, as a devoted fur-mamma to my hound dog, I know that it happened for a reason and taught me to wait until I could really commit to having a dog because they are a joy (but a lot of work!) Thanks for sharing your story and I hope that the right time for a new pup comes along soon!
I have been there, a couple of years ago we decided to get a new dog and only had him for a few days and we new it wasn’t the right time and we were in way over our heads with a new puppy, it ended up being a good decision for us to let him go to a new home. I feel ya!
Big Hugs to you and your sweet family! I adore your family and I commend you for writing this post even though the decisions you make are yours alone and shouldn’t have to be explained! You did what was right for you and that sweet puppy and in the end everyone is happier because of your decision! I know it is still hard so sending good vibes and hugs your way!
Oh Ashley! It hurts my heart to think that you were fearful of writing this post. I absolutely love following your blog and Insta. You can only do the best you can! Please know you have more supporters than critics even though I’m sure it’s easy to think the other way around when you put yourself out there. I don’t normally comment, but thought that I should so you know you have silent cheerleaders! Good for you for making the best decision for your family and for the pup. Keep sharing! Thank you!
Just this weekend I had to inform the rescue group we were planning to adopt TWO puppies ( crazy, I know!) through know that we had changed our minds. Having two little people at home and adding two puppies to the mix would have left me frazzled at the end of everyday. But I completely understand your animal lover side, to me, a house is not a complete home with a dog 🙂 But, I know in I few year God will place the perfect pup in our hands. Thank you for sharing, it’s nice to know these sorts of things happen to other people too!
Hugs to you! I know it was hard, but that sweet puppy is happy and you made the best decision for your family! That’s all that matters! The days will get easier! 🙂
So sorry Ashley! I’m sure that was such a hard decision but you made the best decision for your family and the puppy. No one can judge your situation because only you know what your family can handle and what the right timing is!
Kelsey
http://www.thepeacockroost.com
The absolute hardest decision I have ever made in my entire life was giving our dog of seven years to another couple to raise. Hands down without a doubt. Andrew and I sobbed (I could still sob) about it. It was awful. After seven wonderful years with her, it came to a point where our kids had to come first (we had her before we had kids and once they were around 2 & 3, it was obvious that she hated the kids and it was causing her to have seizures). I know she is so much happier now (they send us pictures of her…she’s 10!), but I still miss her terribly. I really, really miss her and I completely understand your heart. Praying for you friend. This is tough. I totally get it.
Your first mistake was going to a breeder. Way to feed into the puppy mill demand. Your second mistake is teaching your children if a living being is difficult or isn’t doing exactly what you planned, give up!! I was a fan, not anymore.
Get over yourself. This decision was obviously not taken lightly. I KNOW Ashley and her sweet family not only thought about what was best for them but what was in the best interest of the dog! Who are you to judge? It’s obvious after reading her blog briefly that Ashley has a heart of gold.
The problem is that people get a puppy without realizing how much time, commitment, and patience is needed for having a puppy…especially if you add children to the mix. So you either push through or you give up. Thankfully this pup hadn’t had enough time to form strong bonds yet. Glad they gave it back when they did rather than later or keeping him and never putting the time into raising it properly!
Sad
ADOPT, don’t shop. You may be a fan of all things designer but pets aren’t like purses.
It’s always hard to give up a dog.
I have been in this situation before with our old puppy whom we had to get rid of because he was too hyper for our family. Understand that it’s a common thing people go through and God planned this for you and your family. This is the path that got intended for you to take and that everything happens for a reason. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! Xoxo
It is a common thing which is so
Unfortunate! All puppies are hyper! Training has to be done right away and I’m sorry, but Fancy Ashley doesn’t seem like a dog trainer.
I have read your blog for awhile and I am appalled by your behavior. Re-homing a dog is not just as easy as giving the dog back to the breeder (don’t get me started on your need for a “fancy” dog”). That animal may suffer from abandonment fears and reluctance to bond with a new owner for the rest of his life. When you bring a new pet into your home it is like adding a family. If you were planning on teaching your children responsibility and patience you obviously cant because the are qualities you yourself to not have. They will see that you give up when the going gets tough. You mention getting rid of the puppy for “personal” reasons…..YOU WRITE A BLOG! don’t blog f you cant be honest. You probably will just delete this and call me a hater, but i hope you take a look at yourself and realize life isn’t about glitter, topknots and cute nicknames. smh
Sometimes people need to think before they post something on the Internet. You didn’t have to click the blog you chose to you never know what anyone is going through so you should stop and take a breath because this is just rude and non of your business
We had to do the exact same thing with a dog that Santa had brought our kids! That one was tough to explain to them! 🙂 But our family dynamic was harmed by the presence of that particular puppy, and although lots of tears were shed, it was the right thing for all involved. Praying for peace for you. 🙂
First of all let me say I’m so sorry about the passing of your precious dog. And secondly, be gentle with yourself and the decision you made. You did the right thing. You know this because it was right for YOUR family. The puppy you re-homed will find his/her way to the home where he/she belongs and you were a facilitator in that. You did exactly what you were supposed to do. We don’t always understand why these things happen we just have to trust in them. I’m sending you and your family much love and encouragement during your difficult time. ❤️
Oh I love this! About two years ago my husband got me a little Morkie puppy as a surprise because I had been wanting one f o r e v e r. Once the little guy was ours though it was very apparent that we weren’t ready to have a puppy. It takes SO much time and attention and we just weren’t able to provide that for him. It literally broke my heart to admit to my husband that I thought we should find a new home for him. It took a couple of weeks, but finally after tons of prayer that he would go to the absolute best home we found someone! It was a family who had just babysat a friends Morkie for the weekend and fell and love and wanted one for their own. This family had 4 young teens who would be able to give our little boy so much attention. Even though I was crushed to do it, I am so so glad and thankful that he went to a good family and to know that he’s being taken care of. It’s been two years and we still talk about him and miss him, but it really was the best thing for us!
Believe that everything happens for a reason. My husband and I got a German Shepard puppy when we had a 6 month old and a 2 year old. Life was perfect and Winston was a HUGE part of our family. We lived on a big piece of property in College Station and Winston had room to run. Then, life took over and we were transferred to Dallas. Ultimately our perfect house had no back yard…mostly pool and landscaping. My parents live on a HUGE farm in NY and it was the hardest decision to send him up there. 6 months later, Mom was taking her daily walk in February around the farm and she collapsed. She has an diagnosed heart valve. Winston was with her and never left her side. He nudged her repeatedly until she regained consciousness. Then she passed out again….Win never left her side. She made it home, had surgery quickly after that and is in great health. God needed us to pick the most perfect dog for her. All the heartache of letting him go was quickly healed. I know he saved her life. The MD told us after the surgery that with Mom’s condition, less that 1% survive after passing out….Winston was a huge learning lesson. We still get to see him a few times a year and he lives the life of a KING!
The same thing happened to me 1 year ago. I still think about it every day. At the time, my kids were 3, 3 and 6. I really thought I could handle a puppy and within days I crumbled. The dog was nipping at the kids and I couldn’t mentally or emotionally handle raising the sweet dog. I felt (feel) so guilty that I couldn’t do it. I felt I let everyone down. My husband and the breeder were not supportive which made a hard situation excruciating. In the good and bad times we are modeling life for our children. It’s not all easy and there is disappointment in the world. You had to do what was right for the family. And I understand the pain of it all. I’m so sorry.
We had the exact same situation happen to us years ago. I so desperately wanted another puppy in our lives, and at the end of the day, he just didn’t work out. Oddly enough, the stars aligned and he is in a fantastic home and we still get to hear about him often. You have to do what is right for your family, and that’s the most important.
Just know your puppy is growing and having a great time, and I’m sure there will be other dogs down the road!
Ashley, you have such a sweet heart and I am so sorry that it didn’t work out. You did what is right for you and your family, and at the end of the day, that is what matters. Love and prayers!
Wow, I’m disgusted by all the people on here saying the same thing happened to them. Educate yourselves people! A puppy is a lot of work! They poop, pee, are hyper…but they can be trained with patience and persistence. Some people are just too LAZY and selfish they could never be proper puppy owners.
Dear “C”
It’s unfortunate that you can hide behind a letter on the Internet. It’s unfortunate that you don’t know how to show love. God calls us to love one another as we never know what someone is going through until we walk in their shoes. With all of the “filters” on the Internet today it is bloggers like Ashley that actually keep things real and share their lives with us. Ashley is a light on this situation that has personally connected with countless others. Her blog is a safe place for others to share their hearts as well. I personally know Ashley as well as this breeder and my guess if you don’t. My prayer is that God shines a light in you and teaches you love. That you learn judgement is only something God is allowed. I know that you are forgiven for your harsh comments on this post and hope someone gives you a hug today that is full of lots of love. I would personally pass along a hug if I knew you.
God bless you.
I so agree with all of these sentiments. “C” seems to have a lot of bitterness that would be healed by God’s love. I hope that Ashley does not take her comments to heart, as they come from a place of judgment and not compassion. “C” needs our prayers……
Oh my word. God has nothing to do with people buying and rehoming dogs. Please. “C” does not need God’s love. I’m sure she is fine.
Yes
Ash, I know how much you love animals and know how much you love your family. So I know that this decision had to have been agonizing for you. I know you’re devastated. But you did what you knew was right for your family. Hang in there, friend!
My pet just DIED I would never get rid of a pet no one understands theyre a lot of work and its called a commitment… sad
I have to wonder if you have ever had a hyperactive pet that has physically attacked your infant. Then what choice would you make? It is certainly not as if rehoming a pet is the same as discarding it on the road. Loving a pet sometimes means finding a better home for it. Our pet was much happier in her new home!!!
Ashley doesn’t have an infant and labradoodles do not attack people. Get a clue that a lot of people are huge dog lovers and this is upsetting to them.
Love you Ash! I’m horrified that people think they can say these things. Let it go, and know that precious puppy is going to end up exactly where he belongs. Xoxo Nancy
Oh sweet Ashley, I am sure that was a tough decision and a difficult few weeks for you and your family! But your positive outlook on how to handle this situation or any similar situation is what always amazes me about you! Sending you big hugs! Xo, Stephanie
Ashley- I just wanted to let you know that I admire the courage it took you to write this post. There are some decisions in life that are just not easy or simple to make, let alone share them with the internet community. You have placed your puppy in a home that loves and adores him. Please know, while I am certain that the last few weeks have been very difficult for you, your decision has brought one family a lot of joy!-Tammie